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First time fiction

Created on 2004-10-13 20:03:10 (#4825050), last updated 2007-07-27

36 comments received, 345 comments posted

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21 Journal Entries, 15 Tags, 54 Memories, <10 ScrapBook Files, 0 Virtual Gifts, 8 Userpics

Basic Info

Name:	Natalie
Birthdate:	1978-03-24

Bio

An introduction by Severus Snape and Harry Potter

HARRY. Come on Severus you promised.

SEVERUS This is absolutely ridiculous

HARRY. Just do it.

SEVERUS. Fine, but you owe me Gryffindor.

HARRY Yes, that’s what you always say.

SEVERUS Good, now that that is established. Natalie
writes under the pen name Fer de Lance which is
the most venomous snake in central America..

HARRY And….

SEVERUS Yes she picked the name because Harry is
a Parseltongue and she thinks it's clever.

HARRY It is clever..

SEVERUS If you interrupt me one more time Potter I’m
leaving..

HARRY Picky, picky.

SEVERUS May I continue? Or do you want to call this whole
this whole whole introduction thing off? Which, I
think is a brilliant idea..

HARRY I want you to continue..

SEVERUS As I was saying, this journal only contains
pornographic material so all of you who are not
of age go scurry away now

(Dramatic pause)

Of course if your anything like Potter,
You’ll wind up reading what’s in this
journal; regardless if your suppose to or not..

HARRY. Severus your encouraging them..

SEVERUS That is the second time you interupted me Mr. Potter
which ,fortunately for me ends this inane activty.

HARRY (Rolls eyes) All right fine be that way, I'll
finish. And then I’ll be taking off these
sweaty Quidditch robes, and showering...alone.

SEVERUS Do calm down Potter. Is that anyway to treat your
OTP?

HARRY My what?

SEVERUS One true paring.

HARRY What the fu-

SEVERUS Language Harry… O T P or One True Paring, which
is us, except for Fer de Lances’ uncanon tendency
to write you as a top.

HARRY Look Severus, (Dangerous angry voice) I'm not
having that canon discussion again.

SEVERUS I’m merely pointing out, that, I am clearly the
older more Dominant wizard-

HARRY Yeah, well, if Fan Fiction were canon I’d be
having it it off with Ginny Weasley. Do you
want that?

SEVERUS (muttering under breath)

HARRY That’s what I thought. Any way I’m the Dark
Lord vanquishing hero.

SEVERUS It’s a shame I’m not allowed to bring up canon
because, if I were; I would point out you haven’t
vanquished anyone yet.

HARRY Really?

SEVERUS Yes, really

HARRY I have something i'm going to vanquish between your-

SEVERUS BE QUIET! That is the Third time I told you not to
inerutpt me and the second time I told you to watch
language.

HARRY B..but

SEVERUS Quiet, Never the less, I have filled my promise to
introduce the author. Have I not?

HARRY (Silence)

SEVERUS Well?

Harry (feigened innocence)
Oh am I allowed to speak now?

SEVERUS (evil smile)
If you behave, I do have a matching
gag to go with these.

HARRY What no way.

SEVERUS Pardon me if my memory is incorrect Potter,
but did you not say, If I introduced the
Author with you, you would owe me one?

HARRY B... but their lacy

SEVERUS Yes.